As our relatives get older, caring for them can become a difficult balancing act. You want to ensure that they both have independence and that they are well looked after. Too much interference from younger relatives can seem overbearing. While not enough can have negative consequences for their health and well-being. So how do we know that we are providing the right amount of help? Read the do’s and don’ts below for some advice.
Do look out for them
Whether your elderly relative is living at home or in an assisted facility, make sure that you are still looking out for their well-being. Many relatives feel a sense of relief when the senior in question has additional help with their living arrangements. But you must make sure that this doesn’t turn into a complete surrendering up of responsibility for your elderly relative. It’s important you still keep an overview of how they are and what the care that they are receiving is like.
Don’t go over their head
If you do have any concerns, then it’s important to discuss it with your relative first. Don’t go steaming into the care providers, if you haven’t got your relatives side of the story before hand. Even if they do agree it’s likely, they will feel like the control has been removed from them if you do this. The only exception to this is if there is something that prevents your elderly relative being aware of them (for example dementia).
Do continue to have contact with them
It’s essential that even when your elderly relatives do live in a care home or nursing home that you continue to see them on a regular basis. Not only does this help to remind them they are loved, but it also allows you to watch how they are being cared for and identify any issues that need sorting.
Don’t be afraid of making an unannounced visit
It’s also a good idea to occasionally make a visit unannounced. This will allow you to see how your relative is when they haven’t had plenty of time to prepare for your visit. It will also enable you to watch how their carers act with them, and indeed, how your relative acts with the carer.
If they seem scared of the carer it may be a warning sign of elder abuse. If you are concerned that this could be the case, speak to professionals like the police and then nursing home abuse attorneys, who can help you.
Do speak to neighbors or other residents
It’s also a great idea to speak to your relatives neighbors and friends to see if they have noticed a difference in their health or quality of care. As they are around all the time, it might be easier for them to pick out any changes that have occurred. It also gives you a useful way of bringing it up with your relative, as you can say that their friend i worried about them.